At first, I was like a kid in a candy shop, wanting to try every flavor, every texture, every bit of goodness on the shelves, and for a long time, that worked for me. But then one morning, after a particularly raucous interlude, I woke up feeling empty. As if I had not just had great sex. I realized that I actually hadn't. After great thought and soul searching, I came to the conclusion that I had to start being more selective with my tastings.
So I came up with a three step, fail-proof method to choose my lovers, and I am happy to say, I am offering it to you today for the very low price of FREE. Mostly because I think everyone should have the ability to choose great lovers for themselves. I don't want money to be what gets between you and great sex. That wouldn't be right.
Before you read the list, it is a prerequisite that you think that you are awesome. You must truly believe that you are a wonderful human being for this to work well. If you do not yet see that you are a wonderful human being, stop reading right now, go work on yourself, and then come back. This list will be here for you.
- When choosing a lover, you must first understand what turns you on about life. For instance, I am a huge fan of laughing and smiling. As Buddy the Elf says, "smiling is my favorite," and that carries over into my sex life. Sex is my happy place. I want to be able to smile, laugh, and celebrate while fornicating. There are also things about life that you love outside of the bedroom that you might need a break from when you are in the bedroom. For instance, I am in control in many areas of my life. When I am having sex, I like to give that up. It relaxes and arouses me to completely let go of control. What do you like? Write down everything that you love in life, not just while having sex. Determine if you need a break from them while knocking boots, or whether you want to explore them on a deeper level. Sex will allow you to do that. The list should have at least twenty items written down, preferably more. Be thoughtful about this list. Put effort into it. It will pay off exponentially when choosing lovers.
- Secondly, you need to understand how your body works and what precisely makes your body tick sexually. When you masturbate, what do you fantasize about? What is your go-to for bringing it home? It doesn't matter what it is, but it is important to know what gets you there. Pay attention to where your erogenous zones are. Become familiar with your body so that you can be an excellent tour guide. You should be able to articulate what turns you on physically; what kind of touch you like, where you like to be touched, and so on. When you choose a lover, that person will be very happy that guessing games will not be on the menu.
- This final step is very much dependent on the first two being completed to a level where you are chock full of information about yourself. This final step happens when you talk to your intended. If what this person wants from you is sex, then you must be clear about what you like and understand what needs your soon-to-be lover expects you to fill. Now, this is where it gets tricky, because like any good interviewee, many people will just tell you what you want to hear in order to get a run at your goods. This is why you must also listen to your gut. If you're getting that funny feeling inside that this person is not going to do it for you, LISTEN TO THAT. It does not matter how beautiful, smart, charming or outgoing this person is. Your body will know who will and won't do it for you. When you are in front of the person you are considering, silently ask your body if this person can be a good lover for you. Your body will answer in one way or another. I always know. I feel a pull. If I am not feeling pulled physically toward a particular person, I know that sexually, it just won't be happening.
Start now. Make the list, get to know your body. Start talking to people. I am not saying it is going to be easy, but I am saying it is going to be worth it.