I have a big secret. It is not one I am necessarily embarrassed by, but it is not one I am particularly proud of, either. I am the person I used to make fun of. I am the happy, yoga-loving, healthy food eating, cheerful lady who walks down the street saying "hi" to strangers. I am a very different person than I was just five short years ago.
I used to be known as "Angry Sara." For people who have met me in the last couple of years, this seems unfathomable, but, there it is. I will paint you a picture:
When I was young, about 13, I began drinking for various reasons. In high school, I was in and out of in-school suspension and would start fights with people whom I couldn't possibly beat. In college, I continued starting fights, but with anonymous guys in bars. I was famous for it for a while among my friends.
After college, at about the age of 21, I started going to therapy. I also lost the ability to digest food. I had to eat macrobiotic meals for about a year to heal my body. At the age of 31, after 10 years of going to my Naturopath, she reported to me that when I first started treatment with her, one of my complaints was, "I feel like screaming and smashing things all of the time." Yes, and the truth was, I actually engaged in this behavior on occasion.
For years and years I struggled with this anger. In jobs, I found myself at odds with my managers, and my boyfriends were always a little stunned when I would suddenly decide I had had too much and leave the relationship in a rage. I was in and out of therapy with a little bit of improvement over the years, but by the time I was in my early forties, I had not come as far as I had hoped I would in the 20 years I had been therapizing.
It was at this time that my friend Terry, who had been suggesting energy work to me for weeks, and at whom I had been covertly rolling my eyes every time she mentioned it, seemed markedly different in attitude. Though she was going through a very stressful period at college, she seemed much more relaxed and joyful than usual, and I had to ask what was going on.
"BodyTalk!" she shouted at me, in exasperation. That was the method of energy work that her practitioner, Sid Snider, been using. At that point, I had nothing at all to lose. I figured I had already spent thousands and thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours in therapy over the years, what would one appointment with the energy work lady cost me, more or less?
So, I went. From the moment I walked in to her office and shook her hand, I felt more calm. Sid has this remarkable quiet energy that is incredibly comforting to be around. You just trust her. We sat down and I told her about some of the things I was hoping to address; my anger, my acne, my digestion, and my burning subconscious desire to sabotage my best efforts at improving my life.
Sid explained BodyTalk by telling me that it is a way to sync communication systems in my body and clear emotional charge around past events and trauma. The work is completely noninvasive; I would basically lie down on a massage table fully clothed while she tapped into my body's systems. I could even nap if I wanted to! (I have actually dozed off a time or two, but I have never mentioned this.)
I hopped up on the massage table, and she started to work on me. As far as I could tell, she was picking up on my body's messages and responding to what it was asking for. Within a half hour it was over, and I walked out of her office feeling about twenty pounds lighter. I couldn't believe it. I didn't have to re-hash my childhood, my divorce, or my work issues. I felt happy!
Over the next several months, I continued going to see Sid and she would alternate between BodyTalk and Quick Pulse energy work. Quick Pulse removes anything that is getting in your way, be it physical symptoms, emotional symptoms, fear, worries or anxiety. Using Quick Pulse, Sid has cleared knee problems, hip problems, and the neck problems I had been having ever since my last car/bike accident.
My dairy intolerance vanished. My acne disappeared. The stuff at work bothered me less and less. I was less reactive to stuff that for years had pushed my buttons and sent me over the edge. It was nothing short of a miracle, and I didn't have to go to a therapist's office every week, hash out all the emotional issues I was dealing with, and leave wondering if it was finally going to work. My body was energetically releasing my trauma and every aspect of my life was improving dramatically. My anger was vanishing.
Over the past four years, I have continued to go to Sid for help, and my life is in a place I never could have predicted. I am happy most of the time, and my anger is something that I feel and release, not something that drives me to sabotage my work, my relationships and my environment. At the end of every appointment, I thank her profusely, and she always has the same response: "you are the one doing all the work."
What is most gratifying about this is that I am engaged in my life on a level that I never have been before, and the way I care for myself now, the attention I give to my own wellness has given me the space, time and desire to help others. This work has completely removed my self-sabotaging tendencies to such an extent that I now want to help people. It is truly miraculous.
That is why Sid is The Badass this week. Her work has changed a once cynical, angry woman into one who looks for and enjoys the beauty in life. She has quietly and patiently helped me turn my life into a work of art.
In my blog, I write all the time of courage, heart, and honesty. I speak of engagement, and the gratitude. The reality is that if I had not gone to Sid, I would not have any of these things to the extent I do. Her work has truly transformed me. If you are looking to enjoy your life, to heal your trauma, to truly engage in your life, Sid Snider can help you do that.
I owe my badass-edness to her, and for that, I will be forever grateful.
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