Spike's List in Action!

Living in a one-horse town like Bellingham is quite charming when you are a sexually active gal. On any given night, I can walk into a restaurant/bar/bookstore and recognize at least three people I have dated. Such was the case this last week when I stopped into Elizabeth Station after yoga to grab a beer.

It was a beautiful summer evening. I had been there relaxing for about a half hour, standing at the community table enjoying a La Folie when I noticed that one of the men I had picked up there last summer was there with some friends. Moments later, I recognized another man I had a one-day stand with a couple of years before. I smiled to myself, feeling pretty good about the luck of my life, when the one-day man approached and asked if I could watch his beer while he went to the bathroom. I said sure, and smiled at him with a knowing look. Moments later he returned, reporting that the line was too long. 

I then inquired as to how he had been. His response was the beginning of a series of interactions which I can only describe as wonderful. 
"So, how have you been?"
"Fine....do I know you?"
"Yes, I am Sara...."
"Oh, and how do I know you Sara?", he asked, smiling into my eyes...reaching out to shake my hand...I took it and replied,
"I am the Sara you fucked." I replied a bit louder than normal, for effect.
"Oh!!" He looked around, slightly embarrassed.

He then proceeded to tell me that he remembered me and dared me to say that line twice as loud. When I told him I am the kind of person who does that very thing, just for kicks, he reconsidered, much to my disappointment. Once he got over his awkwardness, he decided, once again, to talk about why I didn't want to have sex with him anymore. "I just didn't like it." Was all I answered at first, but he pushed, so I told him that I like to be manhandled more, pushed around a bit. He responded brightly, "Oh, well, I can do that!" Then went into a bit of a lecture about how adults tell each other what they need instead of simply discarding them. In a certain context, maybe. But if you have sex with a person and know it isn't for you, why? Why put in the effort when you can simply catch and release? 

Later, I was at home, telling my roommates this epic tale of delight when one of them exclaimed, "Oh Shit! Oh Shit! Is this guy's name Blake? (Name changed to protect the innocent-ish)  Did he used to be in Real Estate? And he sails now?" I was a bit taken aback by her outburst, and replied very slowly, "yeah.....why?" She pulled up his profile on Ok Cupid and asked, "this guy?" I looked and saw that it was indeed the man in question. "Yeah, that's him."  She replied in exasperation, "I can't date anyone in this town because you have fucked them all!" I just shrugged my shoulders and suggested that maybe I could stop having sex with people in Bellingham. 

She told me that she had gone out with him a while back and he had forgotten about her too, which gave us all pause to wonder if the guy had an actual memory problem. She asked why I didn't want to have sex with him again, and at first, I just said that it really wasn't good and that she wouldn't like it, but both she and my other roommate wanted details, so I gave them.  I told her that he had the unfortunate habit of cheering me on in the most unappetizing way as I was approaching orgasm..."yes, Sara, oh yes, Sara, uh huh Sara, that's right, Sara....." Such that I completely lost my ability to cum...even my desire to do so.  I have to admit that I faked orgasm just so I could get it over with and get him out of there. As he walked out the door, he asked me if I got my toes curled. A perfectly trite ending for a very strange sexual experience.  

After I gave her the description of the sex she agreed that she most likely would not like that. Bullet dodged. At least for her.

This is the thing about casual sex, and why I love it so. It is easily entered into and just as easily left. There does not need to be a lot of time and energy wasted. If a person's sexual style is not to your liking, very little explanation is needed. It is a refreshing experience to be able to feel that free. There are no false promises and nothing to work on. Even if some guy in a bar tells you otherwise.

After our interchange, my roommate sent Blake a message telling him about the amazing coincidence of our cohabitation and similar experience and that she felt like she should cancel as he had forgotten both of us and she didn't feel right about seeing him. He replied that he was embarrassed and would like to cancel. But that he was looking for an LTR. So I assumed that meant I could throw his Captain's card away.

More than anything, I see this series of adventures as proof that a Spike's List could work, given the resources and time to build up a proper data base on the sexual prowess and proclivities of men all over the world. I also think that given people's abilities of review, this could be an amazingly entertaining website. The problems this would solve for busy women world-wide, it boggles the mind. Imagine all the time saved and the heartache averted! Imagine all the awesome sex you could have...with just a couple clicks of your mouse!

Watch for the Indiegogo project coming soon.

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