I do love virtual dating. I view it as a means to enlightenment. Some people see that as odd, but for me, it is a common experience where I have the opportunity to test myself and push my limits. I am in the position of dealing with the anxiety of relating to people through a computer then taking the chance of meeting them in real time.
Earlier this week I met a guy on OKCupid and set up a date for last night. Not much information was exchanged, we just made plans to meet. It started well enough, though when I asked him about his life, he seemed slightly exasperated with the questions. After that, it seemed to just keep getting worse as the night went on. To give you a taste, toward the end of the night, my date reached over, grabbed my breast and proclaimed, "I can't feel anything! There are no boobs here at all!" It is ridiculous, some of the things people do when they are nervous? stupid? drunk? I don't know.
My point is that dating can try your patience and make you want to quit all together. But I can't. I feel like there is too much there, too much good stuff in dating to give it up just because sometimes you get stood up or felt up or what have you. That is why, as I think I might have mentioned before, I have rules.
While some people might argue that rules keep you from living in the moment, or being present, I don't operate in the dating arena without them. They are necessary to my state of mind, emotion and spirit. Basically, they are in place so that I don't get pissed off and quit dating. I will outline them here, with an explanation, so that the true intent of the rules can be understood.
That said, this type of thing very rarely happens. This is, in effect, the reason I have rules, so that when this stuff happens, I remember my rules and take care of myself. I also remember that the only exceptions to the rules are the ones I make for myself. I do love dating and I want to be able to date for many years to come. I know that I will be able to do that if I am happy and not putting myself in a position to be hurt.
So, think about making some rules for yourself. Relationships will be easier. Life will be easier. And dating? You will get more out of it if you make sure to put yourself in the position to be treated kindly.
Didja like this? Find it useful? Know someone who is dating virtually and need to hear it? Pass it on! email it! tweet it! Post it on FB! You never know what might come of it. Take a chance. Go ahead and share with abandon.
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